Everything was fine and dandy until he got word of what was going on in Jerusalem. The city was in shambles. Hope was nowhere to be found. Artaxerxes even made a law that Jerusalem could not be rebuilt. But that didn't stop him. Because the king trusted him, he allowed N. to go rebuild the city. But it wasn't easy. He faced all types of struggles almost every day. But finally the wall was finished. N. could have stayed in Jerusalem and enjoy the great work being done, but he had to get back to the palace.
Here is where I started thinking. It has been 23 days since we landed from Kenya. This entire time, I've been here, but I haven't really been here or focused or anything. It has been a lot tougher to readjust to real life this time than last time. I've really been struggling with why I'm placed here and not in Kenya where so much great, genuine work is being done. Before I left for Kenya the first time, I was living the life like Nehemiah. My parents practically handed me everything I needed and more. This life is ok, but when you get word of the poverty in Kenya, everything changed. As soon as Nehemiah heard the news, he started making preparations to go. Once I saw my sister's pictures 5 years ago, I began to prepare for the day I would be there.
Fast forward. I left on my second trip to Kenya on Feb. 3. This trip impacted my life probably even more than the first one. Nehemiah had a culture shock when he reached Jerusalem. He had to first rally the people and then begin the work. For Kenya, we had to prepare lessons, crafts, medical supplies, etc. Nehemiah faced all sorts of problems. No mission trip is perfect. The enemy is constantly throwing things in the way to stunt our work. If ministry is genuine, it will absolutely be a struggle at sometimes.
Finally, the beginning stages of the work in Jerusalem was completed when the wall was finished. Nehemiah could not stay. He had to go back to the palace. He had a life back there that he needed to do for responsibility. As much I wanted to stay in Kenya, I needed to come back home. I have a life back here. Even though it's been hard to be here, I need to be here. I still have things to do here.
A few years later, Nehemiah was appointed governor of Jerusalem. He was able to go back and actually live there like he wished to before. He just had to wait for a little bit, but then he got to go back.
Kenya is my Jerusalem. I want to stay there, but I can't. I have work here yet to be done. My "cupbearing job" isn't over with yet. But one day, it will be. I will finish my schooling and actually be able to do what I love, working with kids. Now that could be in the U.S., Kenya, Honduras, many places. Those are my Jerusalems. When Nehemiah came back, he was a changed man. He did things differently around the palace. You cannot come back from Kenya without being changed. It's impossible.
Since I really was having trouble with being in the U.S., God showed me tonight that I am exactly where He wants me to be right now. He wanted me to have a part in Jerusalem so it could change me. But I'm here for a reason. I can visit Jerusalem as much as I want, but for now, I can't stay. But one day I will! I will be able to stay for the rest of my life. And oh, what a day that will be!
